Thursday, October 15, 2009

First Born……. Day 15

When we were getting ready to bring Josie into the world, we were prepared.  We were prepared with her bed, stroller, diapers and formula!  We were prepared to expect the unexpected as we didn’t know what our lives would look like after having a child with special needs. 

There are certain things though that you can not prepare for.  Josie was our first born child.  The delays that she experienced really meant nothing to us because we didn’t have a child before her to compare.  Josie did everything during that first year that she was supposed to do and when she was supposed to do it.  That was our normal and typical!  We didn’t know any different.  We didn’t know what it was like to have a “typical” child so the fact that she didn’t walk by the time she was one, wasn’t surprising to us!

Then when Josie was 13 months, along came Katie.  It all began to make sense to me.  Katie was the most advanced child EVER!  LOL  She did everything so quickly, but still wasn’t caught up to Josie and we were ok.  Then the day came when Katie surpassed Josie developmentally.  It was inevitable but I wasn’t prepared for it.  I wasn’t…..  and I must admit that it was probably the most difficult and dark time for me as a mother.  Then not long after came Owen and there are things that he can do that Josie hasn’t quite mastered yet….and it is hard!  I am mostly over it and it is what it is! 

This wasn’t something I even thought about until it happened and it hit me like a ton of bricks.  Most people I know have a youngest child with DS so there isn’t anyone to catch up with them. 

Now we have that in Jake.. our youngest and no one to catch him and NOW I am wishing that I had a younger one yet….one to push him along!  While it was hard, I thank GOD for Katie and Owen (Josie & Jake too) every day because I feel like they have pushed Josie to do things that were out of her comfort zone and accomplish things she might not have accomplished had she not had her sister and brother cheering her along.  While they will really be good for Jake as well, it won’t be quite the same.  Bitter sweet!


RK said...

I know what you mean, we've been watching Kinlee catch up quickly...passing up Braska already in the feeding areas, as we expected.

I'm so thankful that Braska came first, but of course its the only order I know. :o) At this point, I've spent minimal time thinking about that time when KiKi passes Braska by in all will come, so I thank you for sharing how you felt about it.

Andy and Ellen Stumbo said...

I am thankful that my girls are so close in age. Even though N is the youngest, she wants to do everything her big sister does, this has pushed her tremendously! E is annoyed that her little sister follows her around ALL DAY LONG but to look at what Nichole can do because she imitates her big sister is pretty amazing!

Siblings ARE the best therapists!